It hurts

I came home yesterday, after 10 glorious days with my darling nearly-hubby... and no one can imagine the pain it is to leave behind the one you love. Just writing it now makes me cry, and it hurts so bad I think I'll die. Everytime we leave each other to go back to our respective homes, it's like having our hearts broken. And it takes until the next time we're in each other's arms until our hearts mend again. I usually spend like 2 or more weeks after I've left him, crying... I cry when I think of him, I cry when I go to bed at night, I cry at dinner, I cry when I hear or see anything that reminds me of him... I'm a complete wreck, and all I want to do is curl up in his arms and hear him whisper it'll be okay and feel his arms around me. I just wish that he could come home, and I know that he wants that too. But unfortunately, the universe doesn't want us to have it easy. He works so hard to get everything done; today he pays off his credit card in full. Then all he has to do, is save up money, wait for his income tax cheque and he's coming home! We'll probably be living off pasta and water the first weeks, but I don't care. I'd gladly go without food as long as I got him home with me. Home where he belongs.

Letting off steam

Oh my God. Oh. My. Fucking. God. I am soo incredibly on edge right now. I am tired, and sick of these incredibly stupid customers calling in. It's 11 days until payday, and I have a grand total of 72,- NOK in my bank account. Whoopee-bloody-doo. All I want is to stay home and sleep, waiting until my vacation is coming up on the 19th. I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really need a break from these verdammt customers! *GNARL*

Songs in my head

I'm driving myself insane... I have this song stuck in my head, and no matter what other song I might sing.. it keeps coming back! It's a Norwegian version of the song "Tomorrow" from the musical "Annie", and they feature it in a commercial on telly for a mobile network. It's like a whole little musical that commercial, and the silly song is just superglued to my brain! Damn typical... I feel like just bursting out in song, like what is appropriate in musicals.
Nice... now I have a couple more songs in my head. Namely the ones I thought of when I was trying to get rid of "Tomorrow".. the song, not the actual tomorrow. Right, a nice little selection in my head right now; Scissor Sisters, that stupid commercial song, Westlife, one from Phantom of the Opera.. those of you who have seen it, might understand why this song is in my head when you look at the title for this little complaint! lol
Perfect... I am a walking, talking jukebox! I'm a total song-whore.. just can't turn 'em down! hehe I know, gross expression but I made it up myself. Which really says something about me as a person, but let's just now move swiftly away from just that particular train of thought. ;o) Bottom line here is; I'M DRIVING MYSELF CRAZY..!! Oh great.... thank you, now I can add Britney to my music collection for the day. *sobs*

Seriously Sleepy

I am so goddamn tired today... I seriously have trouble keeping my eyes open. Which isn't good when you're at work.. and there are so many stupid customers, and I just want to get a new job..! :o) Some job that doesn't make me want to lay my head on the desk and sleep for a good hour or five. I'm having some instant coffee... and you're supposed to add like one teaspoon or maybe two if you like it a bit stronger. I have three topped ones in... and still I feel like sleeping for a week. Maybe it's this cold I have just simmering below the surface that will never really come out.. maybe I am totally holiday deprived. I've not had a day off since June..!! Do you even know how long ago that is? Hellooooo.... JUNE?! Is anybody even getting howlong ago that is?? Gah, I'm going insane! I've gone an entire summer without any like vacation... that might be why I am soo sleepy now, and in total need of a break from work. I'm virtually burnt out.. I need a reloading period longer than the weekend. The two days of weekend is just not enough to completely recharge my batteries. If anything, it just makes me more tired, because I get to rest a little.. but not nearly enough. And if I had my husband here, I would sleep better, because he'd be next to me... much nicer, too. :o)

Speaking of husband... I called the correct "legal" part of the county board that has to do with weddings here where I live, and I have no eliminated any stress factors about various papers they needed us to send in and papers my hubby-to-be needed. It was all very easy once a real live human explained it to me, so I was very relieved yesterday after that phone call. :o) So we are now aiming for a wedding in April... well, more like a get-together than wedding, really. It'll only be 6 people there; him, his parents, my parents and me. We cannot really afford anything else, and also - it gives us an opportunity to get his application for a more permanent visa quicker. We'll be having a party for our friends and such at a later time... maybe we could invite people for a party once we're both in jobs, and have a bit more money we could throw a party with. Because currently, we've less than no money to party for. And renting a place, food and drink and everything else would cost me an arm and a leg. So we'll have a party later... maybe next year. I don't know yet. Sometimes, I just feel like getting married just him and me... no one else, just the two of us. And not telling anyone about our very small, very intimate wedding day. Just him and me.. getting married.. going out for a lovely romantic dinner.. maybe staying in a nice hotel for the night, just to complete the day. Just the two of us...